This morning as my two girls were fighting over a Nintendo DS game, I was reading a heart-breaking story about Rabab, a little girl aged four and her twin brother who spend their summers working at a brick-making factory in Narwan, southern Iraq. You can see the story here. http://www.thenational.ae/article/20080816/FOREIGN/854404655/1001
These children are younger than Leonardo, but as the journalist points out, Rabab has difficulty “holding a smile”. She has practically lost the will to live. She is destitute, hungry, desperate and will probably spend the rest of her life making bricks. The difference between the lives of my children and Rabab’s is just too distressing to imagine. This girl has no hope that her future will be any better than her present, she has never been to school, her life is unbearably tough and her main battle each day is to find enough water to drink in the searing heat and dust.
So while my children worry about who is playing with the Magic Mario game on a toy that is most certainly worth more than Rabab earns in two years in horrendous conditions, she focuses on not dying of thirst.
Maybe this should make me feel proud, make me happy that I am able to give my children such a nice life. But it doesn’t. It makes me feel like a failure. And like adopting Rabab, along with her entire family.
Copyright: Helena Frith Powell 2008
Dear Helena
Don’t feel bad:you and your family are all unsettled still because you have not yet found your nest where everyone will feel relaxed and safe.Children will fight over such things because it is a context and an outlet for not having their own space and belongings and it is a natural reaction to any house move.
You can’t expect them to appreciate what they have in comparison to the rest of the world; they are having to cope with major stuff of their own.
Keep positive, Helena, it’s all big for them and I’m sure you’ll soon find it all. Give yourself a chance! You’ve hardly got there!I know you’ll all make it. Good luck!
How odd- the previous post just blanked out the issue of the
tragedy of the little girl and those like her. I think Helena just
wanted to put into sharper focus the contrast between the lives
of these children who are just trying to survive with the normal
childhoods we are able to give our kids. Of course we have a sense of guilt about it but the compassion that Helena and the rest of us feel is passed on to our children I’m sure and not just
ignored. We can also contribute to helping thru’ UNICEF etc.
Hi Helena
Glad things are settling a little for you !!! You seem to have lots of support which is great.
The story of Rabab left me feeling distinctly with a bad taste in my mouth too, as I am happily cooking loads of Provencal tarts and this poor little mite has nothing !! I can totally understand the way you feel. It is wonderful that we have been able to give our children so much, but also highlights the “I want it give it to me now culture” that unfortunately a lot of the younger children have grown up with.
The fact as you say, your chldren were arguing over the Nintendo game, makes you feel that our children are dealing with something perhaps you could say is “shallow”. But of course our children have been brought up in a totally different world and for them these are the things that are important.
That is not to say tht we cannot teach them about the world and its problems, a lot of young people are more than happy to help in different ways.
My eldest daughter started collecting pennies many many years ago for Guide dogs for the blind, which turned into her collecting over a thousand pounds towards the training of a guide dog. This association with the guide dogs made my parents turn into “puppy walkers” for the guide dogs association. Where they looked after a puppy for the 1st year of its life before it went back for training, a hard job as you have to teach them many specific things and its hard to give them back.
But this taught my children about people much worse off than themselves and to think of other people and to give a helping hand.
What can we do to help these children like Rabab ? Yes of course UNICEF and the like, But is there something else – Helena you are in an ideal spot to find out. Email me. !
Love Rosemary xxxxxxxx
Did you tell your children about Rabab? Frequently I’ve seen children ‘get it’ and want to help other children who are worse off than themselves.
Much love and much luck.
Hi Denise
I did, and they really did seem to get it, Bea even kept her picture for days.
Hx