Tomorrow we have been invited to lunch at a friend’s house and among the other guests is the editor of Vogue. My question is this; what does one wear to lunch with the editor of Vogue? The whole thing is too terrifying for words.
Do I try to go fashionista? Wear something designer? Do I actually have anything designer? Or should I go Sunday Yummy Mummy; all jeans and baggy jumpers and ‘oh aren’t I just so casual’? But which jeans? Is it now a crime to wear skinny jeans or have they come back in? I also have a pair of high-waisted jeans but worry these may be seen as an affront to her sensibilities.
Maybe a chic image? We are in France after all. Some tailored trousers and a white shirt (black and white is in fashion, I know because Harvey Nicks windows are covered in black and white). But does that tailored look seem a bit too much like I’m making an effort? And how well does the tailored look work with three children climbing all over me? Maybe I should follow the advice of Proust’s Baron de Charlus. “It is only the women who don’t know how to dress that are afraid of colours. One can be brilliant without vulgarity and soft without being dull.”
Today the editor of Vogue wrote a column in the Daily Mail about underwear. Well I can hardly go in my underwear; matching as it is. What will she be wearing I wonder? I imagine something that looks effortless but cost about £2,000.
Added to the stress of my own outfit I have to obsess about what the children should wear. I don’t even know if she has children but if she does they’re probably dressed head to foot in Ralph Lauren and Baby Dior. Olivia of course refuses to wear anything bar a pair of jeans that are too big for her and look dreadful. Bea is easier, I can put her in pink. Leo would like to wear pink but I’ll have to dissuade him. But it’s either that or his Spiderman pyjamas.
The only one I don’t worry about is Rupert who will look elegant and handsome in a shirt and trousers. Hopefully she’ll be so distracted by him she won’t even notice the rest of us.
Copyright: Helena Frith Powell 2007