Naked (again) in the rain
Nudity seems to be a bit of a theme at the moment. Last night I was about to get in the bath when it started pouring with rain. Wearing nothing but flip-flops and some hair extensions I rush out to get the washing in. Wolfie the dog is more excited by the sight of me naked than anyone has been for about 10 years but I think he thought we were going for a walk.
Next I run to the convertible car. Needless to say the roof is down. I hop in and chuckle to myself as I press the button to bring it back up. “Who needs laughter yoga eh?” I think. “Life is pretty damn funny without it.”
Then I catch sight of my hairline in the rear-view mirror. There are a couple of grey hairs showing. I make a mental note to get my hair dyed. But as I sit there starkers waiting for the roof to close a horrific thought hits me with more force than the Green Goblin taking out Spider-man.
“What happens when your pubic hair goes grey?”
Is it a signal to officially give up on life, sex and happiness as you know it? To admit that for you the war is truly over and all you have to look forward to is an old people’s home with bad food and strange-smelling corridors?
Or can you dye your pubes? Is there such a thing as pubic hair dye? If not, this is surely a business opportunity waiting to happen. Or maybe you can just use normal hair dye? Perhaps a few highlights would look good? You could have a pubic-hair makeover. Maybe go for red just to surprise people.
I am hoping I have a few years to go before I need to find out the answer to all these questions. I have no idea at what age one’s pubic hair goes grey but I do know one thing. I won’t be laughing about it.
Copyright: Helena Frith Powell 2007
31 May 2007 helena
One word: WAX
Did you read these meanies?
http://lifeinthedoc.blogspot.com/
Nasty people… but I have to say that I chuckled over the ‘Flip flop’ bit. (sorry!
I didn’t, but now I have…..”minor” writer indeed, compared to them I suppose? Oh well, at least I got to third place. Now where’s my prize?
Hx
PS Wax is a good plan
WAX & then tattoo! I once stayed in this hotel in Berlin, where they had sex channel avaliable to enjoy for free on TV:) Well, germans!.. So, one of the bebes opted for a tattoo of an arrow pointing down, instead of the pubic hear.
I also read this mr. Sandy bit:( he seems to be a very devoted reader of yours, passionately following each new post! I only hope, his pubic hear is completely&forewer grey!
Maria
Just linked to ‘lifeinthedoc’ etc.
Who is this person? - don’t answer, I really don’t want to know anyway!
Heaven help us…..
Thank you girls - I love the idea of Mr Sandy with grey pubic hair - or maybe his name gives us a clue as to its true colour. I thought I was only known as “that awful woman” at home - oh well!
Hx
Almost 51 and no gray down there yet. But having looked, I now realize what color my hair would be if I stopped putting blond highlights in and it ain’t pretty. It sure ain’t blond.
Speaking of bare, I do seem to recall, Helena, when we were at Cap d’Adge doing a bit of research, a very fetching woman who seemed to have had a pubic hair do complete with beads and a rather fetching trim, all dyed a startling shade of pink.
I think a few grey pubes adds a bit of gravitas, myself. Speaking from knowledge.
“Is it a signal to officially give up on life, sex and happiness as you know it? ”
3 things:
Life and sex are not the same thing. So even if you give up on sex you do not have to give up on life (although I know you don’t think so at the time).
By the time your pubic hair goes grey, you do’nt really want sex anyway and realise that…..
happiness is actually sleeping in a bed on your own!
snusmormor - speak for yourself - well a bed to escape to, ‘after’, sounds rather nice
Jm - now what age does that make you I wonder
Helena - please do not worry - it might well be very many years till dye or whatever is needed - I know; a friend ( not me, not me,) remarked that one should be very happy just to be able to spot the grey without the aid of a mirror - it seems tummies can sometimes get in the way (not mine not mine)
Helena,
The Sandylancs thing started on a forum at the-languedoc-page.com. We think it’s meant to be a micky-take of a local guy who has a blog here
http://alex-in-languedoc.blogspot.com/
It all stems from a forum posting about puppies! I don’t know if you already know this. But, if you’re interested - some of the posts are fairly funny and some downright rude! Type in puppies in the search on the-languedoc-page.com forum and you will find the offending posts
Funny goings on in the expat world. Fun to be part of it.
Funny , this came up quite literally on sunday at a swanky dinner in miami. The banter of the “it crowd” had me sweating as visuals overloaded my senses. The consensus seemed to be taking it all off with a lazer. Ass , back, legs, vag, the lot>>>>> Needless to say they all seemed to say how painful it is, but as with stylish shoes the pain is worth it. I agree that we men all to some extent like the bald idea and the fact that pain is involved , an added bonus. Much love
[…] There are many things I worry about. Not fitting into a size 10 pair of trousers, going for a swim in someone’s pool and leaving one of my hair extensions in it, upsetting the few relations that are still speaking to me by writing about them, grey hair in all the wrong places (see naked in the rain post), not sleeping through the night, conjugating French verbs in front of my children’s friends. But last night I was faced with the ultimate threat. […]