A Tiger in my gym

A week ago today I spotted a rare and beautiful creature in my gym. Many women have sighted him before me, but it still felt very special. It was none other than the ‘casually sweaty Tiger Woods’ creature, former world number one golfer and reason that millions of women (and probably men) watch golf now, even though they had never heard of the game before he bounced on to the scene.

We had a deep and meaningful discussion. Me: “Hi Tiger, good luck today, I really hope you win.” Him: “Thank you, I appreciate it.”
He didn’t win, some English bloke no one has ever heard of did, but he played well, and cut a fine figure in his grey sweatshirt and grey shorts (not that I was gazing) with his two bodyguards (I want that job).

Sport seems to dominate my life at the moment. If I’m not spotting Tiger in the gym, I’m on the tennis court. I have become utterly obsessed with tennis. I play it, and then I read about it, at the moment I am going to bed with Rafa’s autobiography every night. Failing that I watch other people play it and then talk endlessly about it. “Can’t you just have an affair like every other women in town?” Rupert asked me the other night as I described my new serving motion.
As I write I see my ical alarm flashing ‘Man U at home’. It is almost time for Chelsea versus Man United. I have been in constant touch today with my old friend Floss who first introduced me to Chelsea when I was 17. She has two children (boys) whose middle names are Stamford and Gianfranco. If only Torres had been playing for us when Leonardo was born he might have been Fernando.

I think one of the things that is so compelling about sport is that it is truly unpredictable, well, apart from Chelsea’s bad form, but as Floss said today, we are delusionally optimistic. On the outside I am saying ‘of course we will lose’ while secretly hoping for a Torres hat-trick. But the point is, we have excitement and unforeseen outcomes, much like a soap opera, without having to sit through 15 hours of Season One. And the heroes are just as good looking, especially in their gym kit.

Copyright: Helena Frith Powell 2012



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