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The birds and the bees…..

30th January 2007 by Helena 1 Comment  

Little Miss CuriousOlivia is at home ill and watching Grey’s Anatomy. There is a girl in the episode she’s watching who suffers from spontaneous orgasms (sounds better than flu). Olivia has just asked me what’s wrong with her.

“She keeps having sort of, well, fits,” I tell her.

“What’s a fit?”

Get a grip, I think to myself. Surely you can tell her what’s really going on. “Well, actually she keeps having an orgasm.”

“What’s an orgasm?”

“Something women have when they’re very happy.”

“Can you explain it to me when the esipode (sic) is over?”

So I now have twenty minutes to try to work out how to explain the female orgasm to my daughter. This reminds me of a conversation we had in Corsica while staying with my friend Rachel. Her daughter Mary and Olivia were chatting about where babies come from.

“Well,” said my goddaughter Mary who is six months older than Olivia. “The man puts his parts near the woman’s parts.”

“Ugh, I’m not doing that,” said Olivia. “Have you done that mummy?”

“She’s got three children so she’s done it three times,” Mary answered for me.

“And your mummy’s got four, so she’s done it four times,” said Olivia. “I’m not going to do it any times.”

“Me neither,” said Mary.

I can hear the credits rolling. Maybe I can distract Olivia with a game of Connect 4. But knowing her, she’ll come back to her question. I’d better think of a better answer than a joke I once heard from a South African (male) friend of mine.

“What’s a female orgasm?”

“Who cares?”

Copyright: Helena Frith Powell 2007


Filed Under: Children, Life, Women, blog --> Tagged With: birds

One thought on The birds and the bees.....

  • G spot says:
    18th July 2007 at 6:23 am

    nice site.

    about the episode on greys anatomy. that girl who is experiencing a very awesome “spontaneous orgasms” must be very luck. because very few women experience that. and another thing why do she have to go to see a doctor when that is not a disorder. it a kind of blessing. she’s having a great time all the time.

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Helena Frith Powell was born in Sweden to a Swedish mother and Italian father, but grew up mainly in England. She is the author of eleven books, translated into several languages including Chinese and Russian. She wrote the French Mistress column The Sunday Times about life in France for several years. She is a regular contributor to the Daily Mail, Mail on Sunday, The Times, Daily Telegraph, Tatler Magazine and Harper’s Bazaar.

Helena has been the editor of four magazines, including M Magazine, a supplement for the Abu Dhabi-based National Newspaper and FIVE, a high-end fashion glossy, also published in Abu Dhabi. Helena was also editor-in-chief of 360 Life, a quarterly glossy magazine published with the Sports 360 Newspaper in Dubai, part of the Chalhoub Group.

Helena contributes regularly to UK-based newspapers and magazines and holds a Masters in Creative Writing from the University of Cambridge. She is working on a thriller set in Sweden as well as a novel about the relationship between Virginia Woolf and Katherine Mansfield called Sense of an Echo.

In 2022 her short story The Japanese Gardener came second in the Fish Publishing Short Story Prize. One of her stories was also shortlisted for the Bridport Short Story Prize. When she’s not writing, she works as a headhunter for the media and entertainment industry for the Sucherman Group. 

Helena, who was educated at Durham University, lives in the Languedoc region of France with her husband Rupert and their three children.

Bibliography

More France Please, we’re British; Gibson Square 2004

Two Lipsticks and a Lover 2005; Gibson Square (hardback)

All You Need to be Impossibly French; (US version of above) Penguin 2006

Two Lipsticks and a Lover; Arrow Books (paperback) 2007

Ciao Bella Gibson Square; (hardback) 2006

Ciao Bella Gibson Square; (paperback) 2007

So Chic! (French version of Two Lipsticks) Leduc Editions 2008 (also translated into Chinese, Russian and Thai)

More, More France; Gibson Square 2009

To Hell in High Heels; Arrow Books 2009 (also translated into Polish)

The Viva Mayr Diet; Harper Collins 2009

Love in a Warm Climate; Gibson Square 2011

The Ex-Factor; Gibson Square 2013

Smart Women Don’t Get Wrinkles; Gibson Square 2016

The Arnolfini Marriage; Amazon Kindle December 2016

Smart Women Don’t Get Wrinkles (paperback); Gibson Square spring 2018

The Longest Night; Gibson Square spring 2019

 

 

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