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Flirting allowed

18th May 2007 by Helena 4 Comments  

FlirtAn article in the Daily Mail today tells us that men are now too scared to flatter women or to flirt with them. Apparently in our PC times a compliment is all too easily seen as an insult. So a ‘you look nice today’ can be miscontrued as either ‘I want to sleep with you’ or ‘you looked terrible yesterday’ or ‘I want to borrow your stapler/pen/hairbrush’.

When I was in London last week we had dinner with some friends at the Groucho Club in London (like you do). Towards the end of dinner I went to the loo. Walking in through the door of the restaurant bit as I walked out was a young man.

“I don’t mean to flirt or anything,” he said. “But you’re really very pretty.”

This comment didn’t make me want to call my lawyer, or my husband, or glare at the man with feminist rancour. No, it made me want to throw my arms around him. But as I concluded he was possibly myopic or deranged or drunk or in fact a combination of all three I resisted. But I floated back to our table and have to say I have only just stopped floating several days later. “I’m really very pretty,” I tell myself at least 100 times a day.

Why do women bother to wear make-up, curl their hair, buy lip gloss and go on diets if it’s not in part to make themselves attractive to men? (Obviously it’s mainly to irritate other women) And what exactly is so wrong with them noticing? If there are any men reading this; go forth and flirt immediately.

Copyright: Helena Frith Powell 2007


Filed Under: Life, Love, Men, Women, blog --> Tagged With: allowed, flirting

4 thoughts on Flirting allowed

  • lady macleod says:
    18th May 2007 at 10:51 pm

    Paris does that for me. I remember when I was in my forties I had been living in the U.S. for a bit and my ego was not in top notch shape. A week in Paris with men following me, policemen stopping traffic for me, and brass flirting non-stop put me floating as well!

    Closer to home now, the PC has not hit Morocco as proven by my
    ‘encounter’ in the market a few days past. Float on!

  • Debio says:
    19th May 2007 at 9:28 am

    Where will we all be if we make all the effort to be attractive and men do not notice?
    I DO think there is a hidden agenda behind compliments (from most men) but who cares?

  • aminah says:
    19th May 2007 at 8:59 pm

    thats funny cause a few days ago when I was walking home, a man coming from the opposite direction stumbled and fell literally beside me. I immedietly offered a hand and as he brushed the dust of his coat he said “I was taken by how pretty you are”.

    I have been walking on air ever since…well that was until I just discovered a huge spot on my chin this morning.

  • Jo Butler says:
    12th September 2007 at 2:10 pm

    Women who object to so-called ‘unwanted flattery’ are, in fact, ugly swamp-donkeys who are only cross because they never get compliments anyway.

    I’m with you, Helena. As long as it is tasteful flattery. It is also nice when your husband is present – he seems to hang on that little bit tighter!

    Also, am I the only one who is disappointed when construction workers fail to whistle when one walks by? Apparently they get special Sexual Harassment talks nowadays.

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Helena Frith Powell was born in Sweden to a Swedish mother and Italian father, but grew up mainly in England. She is the author of eleven books, translated into several languages including Chinese and Russian. She wrote the French Mistress column The Sunday Times about life in France for several years. She is a regular contributor to the Daily Mail, Mail on Sunday, The Times, Daily Telegraph, Tatler Magazine and Harper’s Bazaar.

Helena has been the editor of four magazines, including M Magazine, a supplement for the Abu Dhabi-based National Newspaper and FIVE, a high-end fashion glossy, also published in Abu Dhabi. Helena was also editor-in-chief of 360 Life, a quarterly glossy magazine published with the Sports 360 Newspaper in Dubai, part of the Chalhoub Group.

Helena contributes regularly to UK-based newspapers and magazines and holds a Masters in Creative Writing from the University of Cambridge. She is working on a thriller set in Sweden as well as a novel about the relationship between Virginia Woolf and Katherine Mansfield called Sense of an Echo.

In 2022 her short story The Japanese Gardener came second in the Fish Publishing Short Story Prize. One of her stories was also shortlisted for the Bridport Short Story Prize. When she’s not writing, she works as a headhunter for the media and entertainment industry for the Sucherman Group. 

Helena, who was educated at Durham University, lives in the Languedoc region of France with her husband Rupert and their three children.

Bibliography

More France Please, we’re British; Gibson Square 2004

Two Lipsticks and a Lover 2005; Gibson Square (hardback)

All You Need to be Impossibly French; (US version of above) Penguin 2006

Two Lipsticks and a Lover; Arrow Books (paperback) 2007

Ciao Bella Gibson Square; (hardback) 2006

Ciao Bella Gibson Square; (paperback) 2007

So Chic! (French version of Two Lipsticks) Leduc Editions 2008 (also translated into Chinese, Russian and Thai)

More, More France; Gibson Square 2009

To Hell in High Heels; Arrow Books 2009 (also translated into Polish)

The Viva Mayr Diet; Harper Collins 2009

Love in a Warm Climate; Gibson Square 2011

The Ex-Factor; Gibson Square 2013

Smart Women Don’t Get Wrinkles; Gibson Square 2016

The Arnolfini Marriage; Amazon Kindle December 2016

Smart Women Don’t Get Wrinkles (paperback); Gibson Square spring 2018

The Longest Night; Gibson Square spring 2019

 

 

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